


The River

by orphan_account



Category: Boyfriend to Death (Visual Novels)
Genre: Gen, I wrote this as a dare whoops, Implied Cannibalism, Strade being Strade, dead bodies, law isn't human but i guess it still counts, mermaid au, the best place to meet future business partners is deep in the woods in the middle of the night
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-16
Updated: 2017-06-16
Packaged: 2018-11-14 19:37:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,047
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11214861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Your friendly neighbourhood murderer needs somewhere to dump his bodies.





	The River

Now _this_ was an unexpected development.

Of course, Strade had heard rumours but he assumed they were entirely fictitious; just a way to scare teenagers from snooping around deep in the forest.

There was no way a creature like this could possibly exist, right?

But there it was. It was almost hidden by the steady, deep water of the river and the weak moonlight struggling through the leaves. Top half mostly humanoid, dirty blonde hair splayed in the water, only the bright blue eyes peeking through the surface. Its skin was pale, covered in scars and bruises, presumably from wrestling whatever the hell was brave or stupid enough to pick a fight with something like that. Through the murky water, he could see the flowing fins, razor claws, winding tail disappearing into the depths. If it held still, he was sure it could easily blend into the river weeds and remain unseen.

Strade would’ve taken the time to appreciate such a find if he wasn’t mid-disposal.

The creature lifted its head above the surface, eyes wide in curiosity.

“You’re the one who keeps leaving them here.” Its voice was rough from lack of use.

After a moment, Strade flashed a grin. “Is that a problem, liebling?”

The creature shrugged. “The river makes use of them either way.”

With a chuckle, Strade asked, “The river?”

The creature moved closer to the shore. “If they cannot find use of their bodies anymore, the river will find a new purpose for them.”

Strade tilted his head to one side, dropping his latest work to the ground with a thud. “Is that so?”

“The girl you brought last time is almost clean,” the creature said, “although I had to help more than usual. The fish haven’t taken kindly to her.”

Ah yes, that girl had been quite a handful. Mouthy until the end. Didn’t know when to call it quits. She was certainly entertaining for his loyal audience.

Strade laughed. “I’m glad you enjoy my work.”

It just shrugged. “I have always wondered, you have brought quite a few here,” the creature mused, more to itself than Strade, “how do they die?”

“I’m not sure if you wanna know the answer to that.”

The creature pouted. “I asked.”

Strade rubbed his chin. ‘ _Fair enough,_ ’ he thought.

“Depends,” he said, turning back to the _problem_ behind him, “this one only lasted a day or so. A shame, they made some lovely sounds.”

“You kill them.” The creature’s voice wasn’t particularly disgusted. Simply stating a fact. “And then you bring them here. Why?”

“Do you mean why do I kill them or why do I bring them here?”

The creature pushed itself onto the bank, folding its arms on the dirt to prop up its chin. “Both.”

“I bring them here because it’s out of the way. Who comes out here? Nobody!” Strade smirked. “No one but me.”

“You’d be surprised,” the creature said, “people do come through here. Not often, but it happens.” Its expression darkened. “Once they’re here, they rarely leave.”

“Oh?” His interest was suddenly piqued. “And I suppose you have something to do with that?”

The creature pushed itself back into the water, vanishing below the surface. Strade thought it was gone for good before it re-emerged a minute later, a human skull clutched between its claws.

“This one was a lost girl. She’d gone out on a hike with friends and gotten separated.” The creature smiled fondly. “She’d given up on anyone finding her. She gave herself to the river so willingly.”

Strade stared with a mix of awe and consideration. “So, how many have you got down there in your little collection?”

The creature almost looked shy, glancing away. “Too many.” After a pause, it added, “A lot of them are from you.”

Strade hummed. “And when you kill them-”

The creature tightened up. “I don’t kill them. The river chooses them. I just help them along.”

Strade almost wanted to roll his eyes, but resisted the urge. “Right, sorry, when _the river chooses them_ , what do you do with them?”

After a moment, the creature started to relax, but kept its guard up as it spoke, “the fish and I pick them clean, and I find use for whatever remains.”

_Like feeding the remains to pigs, they’ll leave no evidence behind._

Strade shifted himself towards the shore and lowered himself to a crouch. The creature instinctively backed off slightly, eyes flickering with an emotion Strade couldn’t place. It wasn’t quite fear, but it was something close.

“I’d like to make this arrangement a little more formal,” Strade said with a pleasant smile.

The creature frowned. “I’m not sure I understand.”

“Well, if I pay you a little visit every so often, will you keep taking care of my friends?”

“You will continue to do so even if I say no,” the creature said with a deadpan.

Strade shrugged. “True, but I’ll rest easier if you okay it.” Not completely a lie; the faster his guests disappeared, the better it would be for him in the long run. “Besides, it’s not like you don’t get anything from it,” he added, gesturing to the skull still gripped in the creature’s hands.

The creature scrunched its face up in thought. “I guess it’s okay, then...”

“Ah, thanks buddy! That’s a real weight off my shoulders!” He held a hand towards to creature. It stared at the appendage as if it were some infected animal.

Ignoring the apparent revulsion, Strade asked, “You got a name?”

The creature mumbled something.

“What’s that, pal? Gonna have to speak up.”

“Lawrence,” the creature said, expression suggesting that the mere mention of its name made it feel nauseous.

“Well, Lawrence, the name’s Strade,” he said, “pleasure doing business with you.”

When Lawrence continued to avoid the offered handshake, Strade dropped his hand. He pushed up to his standing position.

“Now, how about we christen this affair?” He turned back to the _issue_ , slumped over where he had left it.

Before he could move towards it, Lawrence spoke up, his voice straining from the prolonged conversation,

“You never said _why_ you kill them.”

Strade glanced back at Lawrence with a smile that would put the Cheshire cat to shame.

“ _Who said I needed a reason?_ ”

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Did I forget to mention that I love me some mermaid aus?
> 
> So I was ‘encouraged’ to write BTD fanfic and this... happened... whoops


End file.
